Better Late than Never: the Euro 2012 Draw Roundup

This draw happened a few weeks ago, but what with a thesis, 3 classes, another writing job, and various nonsense, I never got around to blogging it.

Regardless, Euro 2012 is coming to an ESPN near you this summer, and it's the best international soccer competition outside of the World Cup (some have called it better than the World Cup). With traditional powers like Italy and France mired in troublesome slumps, this may be the year where some lesser-known countries get their shot at taking down football's royalty.

Additionally, this is some of the last top-notch football we'll see on ESPN, as FOX has outbid the worldwide leader for the 2014 and 2018 World Cups. This is truly a massive loss for soccer in America, and will undo essentially everything that ESPN has been doing for the last several years for the game in the States. But that's another story.

Here are the groups for Euro 2012, and the predictions for each:

Group A: Poland, Greece, Russia, Czech Republic

This may, top to bottom, be the weakest group that was possible. The level of play will be low (for top-notch international football), but the level of competition will be sky-high. These teams (with the possible exception of Greece) are known for being tough, scrappy sides, and each will believe they have a great chance to come out of this group. Which they do. Every game in this group will be exciting and significant.
Prediction: Czechs and Russians advance

Group B: Netherlands, Denmark, Germany, Portugal

RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!!!! In all seriousness, this is the definition of a Group of Death. See?

 

They're already making t-shirts

I don't have anything else to say. It's horrifying for all parties involved. Trees may not bear fruit during these matchups. Children will cry. Doves will spontaneously combust. Human life as we know it may be at stake.
Prediction: Germany and Netherlands advance

Group C: Spain, Italy, Ireland, Croatia

This wins first alternate for the Group of Death. Spain's the clear favorite, as they would be in any game that wasn't against the Netherlands, Germany, Brazil, or FC Barcelona. Their coach, Vincente Del Bosque, certainly seems content with the draw. But after that, you really have your pick of the litter. Ireland will be so pumped to be in an international tournament that they'll want to put on a good show. Croatia is a solid team, and Italy is no longer the power it once was. Plus, Spain plays like Barcelona: too much passing, not enough goals. I could see them getting caught in possession and giving up a few goals.
Prediction: Spain and the flying Balotellis (I mean Italy) advance

Group D: Ukraine, Sweden, France, England

England's national team fans piss me off. Mainly because they have gotten their way for the last few major tournaments. This was the cover of the Sun after the draw for the 2010 World Cup:

How'd that work out for you, ya limey tea-swilling numpties? And this draw isn't much harder. The Ukraine can be dismissed immediately based upon the other group members. England will win the group by default, and I think France has recovered enough to beat a Swedish side with an aging, but still omnipotent, Zlatan the Magnificent Nose.
Prediction: England and France advance

David Villa breaks leg, reminds us why the Club World Cup is stupid

This is not for the faint of heart:



Yeesh. Gone are the rumors sending him to Chelsea or my beloved Reds. And all for what? A tournament that essentially no one cares about.

Let's not forget, I do hate Barcelona. However, I wouldn't have hated a January transfer of Villa to Liverpool. Damn you, Club World Cup. Damn you.

Speculative Rip of the Week (Will Hereafter be Renamed)

Hi all. Long time between posts. Busy college students are busy, plus its our blog and we get to deprive you of content for weeks at a time. ha-HA, as the Berba would say.

Anyway, this post is groundbreaking for the 3 amigos here at 3MW. Because from here on out, our most frequent and popular segment, the Speculative Rip of the Week, will be known as....(drumroll)...

the INIGO MARTINEZ HONORARY SPECULATIVE RIP OF THE WEEK

That's right, the 20-year old wizard has done it again. The kid has exactly two La Liga goals for Real Sociedad, and he's got his own blog segment named after him. Spectacularge.

Martinez came to you live back in October with this rifle shot, and he's just gone and outdone himself. With the score tied at 2, IN STOPPAGE TIME, against Real Betis, Martinez unleashed Heaven's fury again with his left foot and vaulted himself into legend status at Sociedad.

View the magic:



Oh by the way, he went bar down. Ridiculous. As Brooks at Dirty Tackle said, "It's becoming clear that Martinez is some kind of wizard."

WHAT THE $&"%

This isn't about soccer. This is about a gross and egregious lapse in judgment by someone high up in an NCAA Division I office somewhere.

No, not at Penn State.

This is hockey news. As we all know, hockey is a cold-weather sport. Much like ice-fishing and snowmobile jousting, this is a sport that is enjoyed by millions upon millions of residents of the northern climes of this wonderful planet we call Earth.

Southerners, well, they enjoy football, drivin' real fast, and turnin' left.

So I found it strange when last year I heard about a little-known D1 hockey team called the Alabama-Huntsville Chargers. That's right, the Chargers are the only D1 NCAA hockey team south of the Mason-Dixon line. They play as an independent, but their time in D1 is short-lived, as they will be downgraded to a club sport after this season.

This might be nothing more than an interesting trivia piece, soon forgotten after the club distinction is enacted, except for one major item:

THEY'RE HOSTING THE FREAKING FROZEN FOUR!!!

Yes, the only NCAA hockey team south of Delaware is the host school for this year's Frozen Four. Stranger still, the tournament is to be played in the Tampa Bay Lightning's arena in Tampa, Florida. Obviously, Huntsville, Alabama is a less desirable location to play than Tampa, but why even insult the intelligence of a college hockey fan by veiling this strange venue with the designation that a school two states away is hosting the event?

It's all very curious. Very curious indeed.

B.Y.E. Intramural Update

Howdy All

Been a while since a post here at 3MW, but just wanted to update our loyal reader(s?) on the situation vis a vis our intramural team.

Currently, valiant former champions B.Y.E. sit at the top of the heap in the BC intramural soccer standings with an unblemished 5-0 record. We'll certainly receive the 2nd overall seed, barring an unforeseen and unheard of situation in which the other undefeated team (Goodwill Stunting, which has 3 or 4 club players) loses and goes to 4-1.

Rubenstein D11 has done its part, with 2 goals on the season from one participant (me) and 2 games played from the other participant (Retired Ginger Prince), who may have his priorities mixed up.

Further updates as events warrant.

HOLD EVERYTHING!!! The most SPECULATIVE of Speculative Rips

While Kyle Walker's goal in our previous post was more akin to what one would expect when talking about a rip from distance, this may end up winning the first inaugural Speculative Rip of the Year Award. Inigo Martinez (Not Montoya, like "I am Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die"), a Spanish U21 defender playing for Real Sociedad, apparently has been watching too many Xabi Alonso highlights.

WATCH THIS CANNON












What a screamer!!! Usually when a goal is scored from your own half it's looped up and over a keeper who is picking daisies at the edge of his 18 yard box. This ball was hit on a string and tucked hard up under the crossbar, past/over a diving keeper, from 65 YARDS OUT.

Truly impressive from the young Spaniard. A banner day here at 3MW, where we make all your speculative rip dreams come true

Speculative Rip of the Week

Arsenal continued their tailspin today with a loss to Spurs at White Hart Lane. Their Polish keeper Wojeshook SheSheznee (that's how I pronounce it) bailed them out on a few occasions throughout the contest, but looked a bit like a wacky waving inflatable arm-flailing tube man on a late effort from the 21 year old Kyle Walker.


footyroom.com TOT-ARS by footyroom

Skip to 3:27 to see the boomer. Walker puts some extra spicy mustard on this thing, and it swerves its way past Shesheznee's arm flailingness. Great stuff from the youngster, and great self confidence to take a rip from there.